Tuesday, July 2, 2013

The Solved Mystery.

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This is a story about when I was a freshie at this particular college. It was the last day of the 'minggu orentasi' and of course, the senior wanted to prank us. What else can it be right? *Sigh* So what they did was they wait in front of the college building, already prepared to attack us with water balloons and pails, both filled with the nasty air longkang.

As soon as we walked out of the building, they douche us with those stinky drain water and threw water balloons at us. *curse you seniors*. Luckily, I was at the middle of the freshie group so I manage to avoid being splashed with those disgusting water from the pails. Then I ran and hide behind a car. I don't know whose car it is and I don't even care. All I care about is I need to take cover. Nothing else matters. Kahkah. Dah macam perang pulak aihh. 

Before I was able to hunker down, I felt something hit me quite hard. It was night time and it was dark. I didn't see it coming. I don't really mind being hit by that thing it didn't hurt that much but what pissed me off is when that 'thing' fell to the ground, it fucking exploded! It was the fucking water balloon and the stupid stinky muddy drain water splash all over and it wets my shoes. Nasib baik sikit je.  Smells like shit la siakk. Thank God it didn't explode on me coz if it did, I swear I'm gonna hunt down and kill whoever throws it. Dah la pakai baju putih. 

Then, as I stood there, or should I say, hunkered there, watching everyone that got hit by the water balloons, gets wet, and not to mention, smells like shit, because the balloon explodes as soon as it hit their body, and I wonder, why didn't the one that hit me explodes on me like it did on everybody else but fell to the ground instead? Lucky me, huh?

Maybe I'm thinking too much but I can't help but to keep on wondering why didn't it explodes on me? I know, it's stupid. Most people will just let it go and forget about it as it's not even important but then there's me, keep on wondering and thinking over stupid little things because I'm 110% confident that based on the strength of the impact when the balloon hit my body that day, it definitely, positively, surely, should have exploded. Being lucky can't be the only explanation. *Ayat bajet saitifik sangat* *angkat2 kening*

Then one day, when I was in the lecture room (I won't call it lecture hall. It's so small it didn't deserve to be called a lecture hall) trying my best to understand what the heck the lecturer is talking about, it suddenly hit my mind. *Really brain? Really? This is the best time you can think of to remember what happened? Really?!* So I think I know now why the balloon exploded on the ground instead of on me. You see, when the balloon hit me, it fell perfectly, exactly, precisely, nicely, smoothly, on my boobs. Yes you read that right. On my boobs~ And these cute little twins are bouncy enough to absorb the impact of the hit and bounces back the balloon, making it fell to the ground and proceed to explode. Mystery solved!

Here comes the retard moment. I suddenly just laughed out loud like a retarded seal, forgetting the fact that I was in a room filled with people, and everybody in the room, I repeat, EVERYBODY, including the lecturer, looks at me with the "What the hell on earth is wrong with you? What's so funny you fucktard?" look, and I don't even know how to explain. And you know what's worse? I can't stop laughing my ass off!

So I guess it's the boobs that saved me from being the victim of oh-god-eww-that-smells-like-shit-eww-no-i-changed-my-mind-shit-smells-better-eww-I'm-gonna-puke-eww-eww-eww water balloon. Boobies are life savior! Yay for boobies!!

So yeah. Love your boobies. Don't ignore them. They need love too.